How To Do Las Vegas In 48 Hours

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Before Covid-19, when I would see the text “Vegas? Who’s down?” in the group chat, I knew the quick weekender would be a lot of things but the last thing it would be considered as is responsible.

Covid-19 changed that real quick, but there are still many things to do that will still have you questioning your judgment while providing some epic stories to share back home.

Las Vegas in 48 hours

Arrive:

Pioneer Saloon at Goodsprings, NV

When you pull off the freeway to search for the bar in the middle of the desert, you half expect to get carjacked by highway bandits. You’re driving for several miles straight into nothingness and away from any freeway or civilization.

This is the thought process one goes through when looking for the spot:

“Wow how unique, I’m just a few miles away from this really cool saloon.”
“Huh, I’ve been driving for a bit now.”
“Okay, well, there isn’t anything out here, is this the right way?”
“Pretty sure this is wrong, no way someone is driving this far out for a bar.”
“I think my GPS is broken, this is definitely not right, how do I turn around?”
“There is no turn-off road. I’m driving into the desert; probably straight into a group of highway bandits. I’m going to die– oh there’s the bar!”

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And there it is. Just the bar and the Ghost Town Cafe next door. This bar is a living piece of movie history with walls filled with all the evidence you need. So much so, that you’ll probably have a harder time finding someone you don’t recognize from Hollywood. We’re talking about Sandra Bullock, Cheech, and Chong, Clark Gable. The walls are packed with photos and the list is endless. This spot is apparently haunted and ghost hunters are known to frequent the area. Pioneer is also frequented by hundreds of bikers who spend their weekends riding through the desert to visit this little spot that appears like an oasis.

This place isn’t a tourist trap, it’s a respite from it all. The worn wooden bar top still has cigarette burns from when Clark Gable took residence there. I’ll let the bartenders tell you the tale because that is where the true entertainment lies; not the flashy signs or bottle service at the typical Vegas hotspot. Pioneer Saloon is where you come to be entertained with a story from a character (if you’re lucky) and that in itself is the best part; the story of how everyone else ended up at this place in the middle of the desert.

You can spend the whole afternoon reading the history of the place from framed old newspaper clippings and how the hotel across the street burned down. Stay late enough, (and you should) you can watch the sunset and then the stars come out. Now, this is where you head out of the bar and to your car where you take a seat on your hood and watch the best light show off the strip. Makes the long drive worth it.

Paradise Cantina 24 hour Mexican Cantina off the strip

Your first night of Vegas should always end at a bar at an ungodly hour. It’s hard to have this same experience in Covid-19 times but some reconnaissance work brought me to this divey gem. When I arrived at midnight, there was one person walking out. It’s way off the strip and that’s why this place was perfect. The owner was the bartender and walked around carrying a gun strapped to his side. Very old-school cowboy Vegas but also very necessary. Just like the Pioneer Saloon, Paradise Cantina won’t ask why or how you got there, or question your decision of chilaquiles as a chaser to that Don Julio you just downed. No judgments in this full bar with a jukebox and that’s the way I like it.

Saturday

Red Rock Hiking – Calico Trail

No matter how much the crowded Las Vegas strip calls your name, stay strong and stay away. Instead, turn to nature to clear the mind and clear up that hangover. Specifically the desert landscape at Red Rock Canyon. It’s a national conservation area and the scenery is so beautiful, the canyon is often the site of weddings sans the Elvis officiant. Drive 25 minutes west to witness majestic sweeping scenes of massive colored pieces of earth jutting from the ground. For beginners, follow the Calico Trail for an easy hike. Remember that you are hiking in the desert so there are no trees, so you’ll need to hit the trail early to avoid getting caught in the desert heat. Even just driving around the alien-looking landscape is worth the trip. Make sure to bring a hat and plenty of water but please leave your Bluetooth speaker at home. If people wanted to hear club jams, they would have stayed on the strip.

Impact Archery

So archery seems super low-key but can get competitive. It levels the playing field because all you need is good eyesight and a steady hand so you can finally beat your marathon running sister at something. It’s surprisingly satisfying to hear the whoosh of the bowstring as it launches a seemingly harmless arrow into a target. You’ll see how deadly those suckers can really be as you watch crossbow-wielding experts further down the range hit bullseye after bullseye at targets twice the distance away.

SkinnyFATZ / Beer Zombies Draft Room

This absolutely delicious eatery is right next door to the archery range and it is a perfect way to round out the afternoon. The menu at SkinnyFATZ is exactly how it sounds. Dishes that sound gluttonous until you realize half of the menu is vegan and the other half is just different types of meats in various arrangements. Order from the Healthy or Happy side of the menu which is literally split down the middle. For example on the healthy side: turnip taco, on the happy side: shrimp tacodilla. A girl’s got to love options. Here’s the cherry on top: the restaurant shares a tiny bit of its space with a brewery. (Meaning just a bar top and room for four stools.) The brewery has a variety of everything but my favorites were IPA’s, sours, and ciders. The selection was varied enough so I ordered a flight that did not disappoint. While I am a fan of Fat Tuesday, I’d take a flight of beers over a two-foot-tall sugary drink any day. Quality over quantity my friends.

Now for those of those insistent to visit the strip, it’s pretty weird out there. Some casinos are packed with crowds with masks half on while others are calm, clean, and empty. You don’t know what you are going to get until you suddenly find a massive throng of people around the corner. Another new reality, if you want to eat out on the strip you need a reservation and spots fill up quickly. So have a plan or stay in your hotel because drunkenly wandering aimlessly for food isn’t an option anymore.

Neon Museum / Mob Museum

For a raging Las Vegas night, I say head to the museum… seriously. Clubs are closed and bars are mostly shut down. You can’t mingle and meet new people like we would have pre-Covid-19 so go experience something new instead.

The Neon Museum is a collection of all the old signs that used to line Downtown Fremont and the Las Vegas Strip. You see the evolution of Sin City from a seedy escape for mobsters to a classy place to enjoy a cosmo poolside. The Instagram opportunities are endless, tickets are timed out to make sure the place doesn’t get crowded and the best time to go is at night when the signs are all lit up.

If you want to learn more about the seedier side of Vegas, go to the Mob Museum. The interactive exhibits are basically like walking into a crime podcast. Every corner you turn, you learn more about the dark history of the city shaped by mobsters and their lawyers. One of the most famous lawyers was Oscar Goodman. He was cherished by leaders of organized crime for his ability to keep them out of jail. So cherished that Mr. Goodman became Mayor of Las Vegas and helped build the Mob Museum. He reigned over Vegas until 2011 when his successor took over. Can you guess who? It’s his wife. She’s now in charge and will be until 2024. Mr. Goodman now owns a steakhouse that bears his name and overlooks Fremont Street. Rumor has it, the joint has secret conference rooms in case any important meetings need to take place over libations. It’s Vegas baby!

Now, normally I would suggest you check out Oscar’s because the food and service is impeccable but Fremont street is even more packed than Las Vegas Boulevard with fewer face masks. I avoided it at all costs but put it on the itinerary for next time.

Sunday

Climb Vegas

The one thing I did risk going to the strip for was a high ropes course at Climb Vegas. You are suspended about 40 feet in the air over walkways of people going through the Miracle Mile shops that lead to Planet Hollywood. You get strapped into a harness and after sanitizing, you turn into an adopted member of The Flying Wallendas. The trippiest part is the mall kiosks right under you cross rope bridges and thin steel beams. You are looking down and seeing a 20, 30, or 40-foot drop onto people. You won’t actually fall because you have a harness but the idea freaks you out anyways. There are 17 courses and I’d hands down do this again on my next visit. I was the only one on the course most of the time. There were encouraging operators to help if you got stuck. Two people couldn’t be on the same platform at the same time which meant when someone finally did join me, we were always 10 to 15 feet apart with masks on 40 feet in the air.

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Seven Magic Mountains

On the drive out, get your last piece of culture in by visiting Seven Magic Mountain. The art installation appeared in 2016 and consists of seven stacks of colorful boulders in the middle of nowhere. Seeing such color and light is so unexpected that it seems to make people feel a bit giddy. The art is beautiful, the background is gorgeous and the people watching is hilarious. If you are in no rush to hit the road, I suggest grabbing a beach chair and watching how many poses an Instagram influencer can come up with. On my way out I saw a woman bring a team of stylists and a pop-up changing room. She was taking maternity photos there. Vegas baby!

Final Thoughts for the Road:

As the world starts to open up and weekend trips to Vegas become a thing again, Covid-19 reminded me that there are plenty of things to do off the strip and away from the drunken crowds whenever you are looking for respite from the debauchery. We shouldn’t lose our need to look beyond the well-worn path and instead enjoy the road less traveled (to quote Robert Frost). Whether that be a brewery on Dean Martin Drive or magical mountains in the middle of nowhere, go explore!