So it’s finally here! The moment we’ve all been waiting for! Vaccinations!

That’s not generally the romantic sentiment that we think of when we think of our partners or loved ones but it is the topic that’s on everyone’s mind.

Last week, the CDC announced new guidelines that stated, fully vaccinated individuals are no longer mandated to wear masks, now it’s up to local and state guidelines and even businesses to choose whether or not to institute their own. What this means for the rest of us is a little reprieve from the won’t they or will they?

If you’re like me, I have spent the last 14+ months in isolation-ish with my husband, toddler, and his mother, (She literally pulled a Gilligan, came for a visit, and had to stay).

We spent a lot of time together but one of the most important aspects, alone time, both on our own and as partners, kind of went away. Sure, we spend time alone when we take our weekly trips to the supermarket but our conversations generally centered around everything else.

Don’t get me wrong, we tried. During the beginning of the pandemic, we made an effort but somewhere along with the third lockdown or wave, we gave up. I don’t think we’re alone on that front. According to a study in health psychology, “…recent literature has shown that the uncertainties about health and work, combined with social distancing and homeschooling connected to the forced lockdown, have had an impact on psychological adjustment, influencing anxiety and depression levels, sleep and eating patterns, and somatic symptomatologies.1”

The stress of the pandemic and not being able to do anything about it, caused a few of us to spiral to places previously unknown. That, plus the constant worry given our pre-existing conditions, lack of childcare, working from home expectations – it was a lot.

It was a real challenge for our relationship and it still is but with the vaccine, there’s a little hope peeking out in the distance. So how do we find romance in our relationship?

First, let’s get real! How many of us got too comfortable during the pandemic? I did! No make-up days became the norm, sweat pants/pjs were normal work attire, and what’s the point of getting dressed if we’re not going outside? We just got sloppy and way too comfortable.

And people are noticing. When’s the last time you put on something nice for yourself and your partner? It doesn’t only have to be in the bedroom, but in any part of our everyday life. Wear that perfume that makes you feel sexy. Or that hat and dress that match perfectly.

Sometimes we forget that it’s not only those on the outside, we need to try a little bit. Even putting an outfit together can sometimes change our mood and energy, bringing new excitement into our relationships. And if your partner asks you, why are you dressing up? Don’t take it badly, but that is the first sign that it’s been too long.

Second, make plans again. Our days are still a little repetitive, they’ve improved but we’re still working from home, still eating at home, and still spending entirely too much time at home. We have gone hiking as a family every Saturday for the last few weeks. It’s great to get out and be together in nature as a family. It’s so nice to get some fresh air and create memories along the way. Sometimes we let our toddler lead the way which can lead to some adventures!

And lastly, make a renewed commitment to your relationship. The vaccine may open possibilities but it may also draw in distractions. Those distractions we had before the pandemic, the things that prevented us from spending time with our loved ones. As the world starts to open and life may become busier in a way it hasn’t in a while, make that acknowledgment and commitment before that happens. In whatever way makes sense for you.

There are so many ways to recommit. Make a planned date night. Work on your relationship and make a life plan for it. What’re the next 3-6 months and further look like? The next 3-5 years.

Maybe that’s the strategist in me but I believe if you plan it and work on it, we’ll be working towards it. And your relationships are definitely worthy of work.

We think romance just happens and it can, but more often than not it’s the times we plan to be presently together that take our breaths away, especially when we make it a part of relationships.