I have not been single for a long time; however, I was watching a romantic comedy (like most of us girls do) and, of course, the female lead is making the same mistakes we all do.

Mistakes that cause us emotional and mental agony. Mistakes that are somewhat glorified and rewarded in movies and books. Mistakes I have made.

Thinking Sex Would Lead To A Relationship: Sex is an exhilarating activity. Sex can be between two people without love. Sex is healthy. However thinking someone would change, because you two saw each other naked is ridiculous. If someone isn’t ready for a relationship, they are just not ready. Shared endorphins during a ten-minute ride isn’t going to change that.

Keeping Your Feelings To Yourself: However, if you like someone (like you really like them) but you are afraid of getting hurt, or afraid the pseudo-relationship you have will end, so you keep quiet is insane. You deserve to be loved. You deserve to be happy. So be open and honest. It might hurt because the other person might not want a relationship, but you should know now instead of fighting your feelings.

Chasing Someone: Chasing anyone might look romantic or even sexy in a romcom, but it’s unrealistic. Chasing after anyone stumps your growth and hinders your other relationships. While you are fixated on someone, who doesn’t care, you won’t see what’s around you. Such as friendships, family, and personal goals.

I am not proud that I have made these mistakes. I am not proud that I followed romantic comedies narratives like so many of us do. I have learned that love is meant to build you up, not meant to make you look like a fool. So let’s take ownership of our feelings and make 2018 the best relationship year ever. Let’s end the madness and approach relationships with some common sense.